Paula Doyle from Gainsborough has been fostering Lincolnshire’s looked-after teenagers for 7-8 years. She shared her some of her experiences.
Paula said: “Foster teens need just as much stability, love and care as younger children. There’s no escaping the fact that teenagers want to be more independent, but they often need of a hug just as much as any other child – even if they claim it’s naff!
“Earlier this year, a 13-year-old boy moved in with me at an emotionally difficult time for him. It wasn’t easy at first – he struggled to accept his circumstances and remained closed off. He was frail looking and very downcast. During the school summer holidays, he turned down my offers of activities and never really engaged in conversations with me. At this time, he was also struggling with bullying, so I found a boxing coach to help him learn a little self-defence and self-confidence.
“Well, now he goes boxing four times a week, has a boxing bag at home for practice, skips and practices his footwork and other moves in the garden or his bedroom. He spends time watching bouts on YouTube and has developed firm favourites among old and new professional boxers. He enjoys an amazing relationship with his boxing coaches, and they say he has a real natural talent.
“His confidence is already growing as he’s not only found something he is good at, but it also offers him discipline and an outlet for his feelings. Our relationship has benefited enormously as we’ve something to share, and I show my support, not just by taking him training and to watch actual boxing matches occasionally, but by having the opportunity to praise him and tell him how proud I am of him. He now seeks me out to show me how much he is learning. I’m also receiving positive feedback from the pastoral care team at his school about his improving presentation and emotional well-being.
“We have a way to go before he’s fully settled here, but, with a bit of lateral thinking and patience, our journey to that loving relationship has truly begun.”
Lincolnshire has a diverse fostering community. Each application to foster is considered on an individual basis and you can be a foster carer regardless of your marital status, sexuality, employment status, ethnicity, or religion. However, you do need to have a spare bedroom for a child or young person to use.
If you think you could foster a child and would like to know more, visit www.lincolnshire.gov.uk/fostering. You can also get in touch with the Lincolnshire fostering service by calling 01522 554114.